Wednesday, February 24, 2010

hey jack, where did the fridge door go?

on sunday, i decided that i was going to give up diet pepsi for a week. if i could make it a week, i was planning on trying two weeks. as many people know, diet pepsi is, effectively, my crack cocaine. up until today i was fine. screw you diet pepsi, i said. then today kicked in. i literally felt like i was either going to fall over and cry or find stray cat and rip its eyeballs out.

i would say a cat in general but pets are out of the question. that is someone's child.

so i have come to the conclusion that my addiction is something to be weened off slowly. if i get to a week and i still feel like inflicting eye injuries on family-less cats, i may have to get back on my crack. hi, my name is samantha and i have an addiction.


when we were younger, most kids got to go to the store and pick out cool sleds. what most kids didn't get though was a very creative polish father. instead of buying a sled, my dad thought to himself "gee, i have this old steel refridgerator door and a rope, this will work". bam, you have the best sled ever. you couldn't buy a sled that awesome. there just weren't enough creative dads and steel doors in the universe. the only downfall of this was that, as you may expect, being a fridge door and all, it didnt really have a braking system. if you went down the hill and there was a street close, you had one option. grab the rope and bail. i would say let it go into the street, but i am sure someone driving down the street would't appreciate suddenly having a large fridge door fly out in front of their car.

also, unlike regular lightweight plastic sleds, it was a FUCKING REFRIDGERATOR DOOR. and as we all know, if you want to go down the hill, you have to climb up, with your sled. not only was my dad awesome enough to invent it, he also carried it up. what a great creative polish dad!

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