flower arrangements

yesterday a woman came into our office.  this woman had two fake flower arrangements in her hands and stated that "hi, i make these, i have MS, this is my part time job". regardless of the fact that she looked like she hadn't showered in a few days and may have been crazy, i asked her if she had a card.  i was then told that she did not have a card and that i should just buy one of the two she was shoving in my face.  she then exclaimed "aren't they pretty". 

one of them had a huge owl decoration thing and it was totally pretty. pretty creepy.

i then passed her off onto my coworker who was nice enough to agree that they are pretty, but unfortunately she was not interested.  the lady then looked at me one more time in the hopes that maybe in the last 24 seconds i had found a need for her arrangements.  i did not. she got a sad face and left.

i then thought to myself "we really need to get a no soliciting sign".

last night i was laying in bed starving and with a headache.  i figured that this may have been caused be a lack of any food during the day, possibly..  i then made the decision that sleep was not going to happen until i put something in my mouth. dirty.  i went downstairs and grabbed two string cheese sticks and stole one of gma's diet cokes.  i then sat in my bed, eating what felt like the most delicious meal of my life.  it was that incredible of a meal that instead of being a civilized human and throwing the wrappers away, i was so happy that i just passed out.  can i just say that waking up with a string cheese wrapper stuck to your arm is both confusing and uncomfortable.  plus its not even classy.  and i wasn't even drunk.   i don't even know why im making this public knowledge.

sometimes when i blog, i think that maybe i should not be sharing such intimate details of my life and my thoughts.  i then realize that sometimes, we need to know that there are people out there that are more fucked up in the head than we are.  if i can be someone's "girl who's more fucked up in the head" than that person, i feel honored.  the reality is that it's a win win.  people can feel better about themselves, and i have the ability to save all of it so that 20 years down the line when my kids wonder why the hell they are so fucked up, they can have visual proof that it's not my fault. it's just genetics. and they should be happy that i only passed down my weirdo genetics and not my giant ass ones!